Three Words Back...

Top 4, No Really This Time

8:38 Lowrie looks like he's get carded at a PG-13 movie.  He should borrow some of Youkilis' facial hair.  He makes Justin Burleson look old.  That's not a baby face, that's a brand new embryo face.  Zygote Lowrie eventually flies out to center.  Good luck next trimester, little buddy.

8:40 Varitek is up next, sporting the knee high red socks, just like I would if I got paid millions to play baseball.  As it is now, I'm paid thousands to open banks, and I wear knee high argyle socks.

8:42  Somewhere in that mess about sock stylings Varitek grounded out and Coco(a) Crisps singled to right.  I'm begging the announcers to refer to him as Hot Cocoa...but it hasn't happened yet.

8:42 Pedroia strikes out, leaving Cocoa to cool off all by his lonesome on first.

Top 4

8:23 Our first casualty of the game is an umpire.  I'm reluctantly skip the easy "must be going to get his eyes checked" joke.

8:25 These Brooke Shields VW ads are pretty funny...at least when I'm only paying half attention.  Of course, if it was 1980's Brooke Shields, she'd be getting my "full attention" if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

8:26 Tonight's announcers are Chip Caray, Ron Darling, and Buck Martinez.  I had it written into my contract that I would need at least 6 figures to live blog a FOX game done by Tim "You Damn Kids Better Get Off My Lawn" McCarver.

Anywho, after some talky talk blah blah blah we go back to commercial.  Apparently the remaining umpires will have to paper-rock-scissors to see who will get behind the plate next.  I suggest a best 4 out of 7 series.

8:29 More Brooke Shields.  Something about VWs getting people pregnant?  Parents of teenage girls everywhere just scratched that car off their sweet 16 birthday present list.

8:31 Craig Sager has what I can only describe as a "sea of paisleys" on his electric blue tie.  Paisleys, of course, look like sperm...at least as they were drawn in the A/V health cartoon / video we saw in the 5th grade.  Some real cutting edge technology available back in the late 80's.  I still have no idea what's going on with the umpiring situation, I am THAT amazed by what Craig Sager is wearing.

Bottom 3

8:08 Gabe Gross leads off the third.  Gross is one of the two players in this series that I can say that I not only met, but have actually spent time with.  He and Boston catcher Kevin Cash played for the AA Tennessee Smokies in 2002, who also gave me the internship I needed to collect that Master's Degree in Sport Management that has been ever so useful to me in my career as a......professional banker.

Anywho, Gross strikes out.  More intern stories later.

8:11 Beckett hits "J Bartlett."  Did Aaron Sorkin name some of these players?  Josiah Bartlett is standing on first base...I wonder if we'll see Sam Seaborn or Josh Lymon later?

8:12 For reasons that in no way are related to good taste or common sense, Craig Sager also has a "sideline reporting" gig for the MLB playoffs.  I see he's still raiding Justin Burleson's closet.  Tonight's wardrobe includes an electric blue jacket and pants combo.

8:13 Before I forget, tonight's game is being brought to you by Pringles, Blue Moon, and a pile of dirty laundry in the corner.

8:14 It dawns on me that I never blogged about my trip to the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, New York.  It's cool.  You should go if you ever get the chance.

8:16 Iwamura pops out.  As far as I know, he didn't "poop out", as was originally typed.

8:20 Upton grounds out after fouling off approximately 37 pitches.

Top 3

7:52 FYI - I'm also taking questions by text and email, for use during any pitching changes / rain delays / blowout scenarios.

7:53 Coco Crisp leads off for the Red Hose, flies out to center.

7:54 The announcers tell us that Tropicana Field is sold out...reminding me of all those times in the 90's when the Braves couldn't sell out home playoff games in Atlanta.  Braves fans Greg and Michael - what's up with that?

7:55 Pedroia draws a walk, and Ortiz doubles him over to third a moment later.  That happened so quick, I hadn't even gotten my hand out of the Pringles can.

7:58 Youkilis with the RBI groundout that also advances Ortiz to third.  And now I've got Pringles Cheddar Cheese dust on the bed.  Meanwhile JD "Don't Call Me Doctor" Drew also walks.

7:59 We have our first meeting on the mound.  Shields starts off Jason "Sittin' On The Dock of the" Bay with a 76 mph change up...which just happens to be twice as hard as I was able to throw a baseball at the County Fair in Big Spring a few weeks ago.  Obviously, the speed gun was broke.

8:03 Bay walks, loading the bases for Mark Kotsay...giving me a chance to use one of my favorite baseball phrases - "the bases are drunk." 

8:04 Kotsay and his not-even-to-the-warning-track pop out end the inning, stranding the inebriated baserunners...or something.

Bottom 2

Typical baseball game is about three hours.  Zero research but my best guess is that the average playoff game lasts a little bit longer due to more pitching changes.  That's usually how long it takes me to type one moderately long post (or search YouTube for early 90's rap videos).

7:46 Beckett gets a first pitch groundout from Carl Crawford.

7:47 Nic now reports that Roger Clemens is at the UT game.  I whiff on a good steroid joke while Floyd strikes out looking.  If he'd struck out swinging, that sentence could've been a little more fun to type.

7:49 "D Navarro" lines out to right.  I'm not looking it up, so I'm assuming that the Rays signed ex Red Hot Chili Pepper Dave Navarro just in time to put him on the playoff roster.  Inning over, and I sing a little "give it away, give it away, give it away now", much to the annoyance of rooms 200 and 204.

Live Blogging Game 6 of the ALCS

7:19 So...I was going to live blog tonight's MLB Playoff Game - Game 6 of the American League Championship Series, but the TBS affiliate here is having "technical difficulties" and is instead airing The Steve Harvey Show.

Yeah.

So instead I'm watching the #1 ranked Texas Longhorns on ABC.  Texas is up 7-0 on Missouri.

And if ESPN's MLB Gamecast is to be believed, BJ Upton just homered in the bottom of the first to lead Boston 1-0.

However, I refuse to liveblog an internet feed of a baseball game, so the Red Sox will have to win tonight if they want another shot at....

....wait....

...TBS is back and Beckett just got a 6-4-3 double play to get out of the first without any further damage.

There Is Only One October

Baseball playoffs are well underway.  Seems like just a few weeks ago I was sitting in my Mishawaka hotel room and live blogging Boston's series clinching win over Colorado.

I'm predicting a Red Sox - Phillies World Series.......which means that residents of Boston and Philadelphia are wondering why in the world I would want to jinx their teams with such a prediction.

Now, if we can just get TBS to eliminate all those commercials for Frank TV....

I Broke Three World Records While Typing This Blog

• Bela Karolyi needs his own talk show.  Like tomorrow.  Obviously it will need to come with subtitles, but this needs to happen as soon as the Games are over.  Someone get FOX on the phone.
• Did you see it when Bob Costas brought up Bela's questioning of whether the Chinese women gymnasts met official age requirements?  His face was eerily reminiscent of Mike Myers' when Kanye West made his "George Bush doesn't like black people" remarks.
• And yeah, I don't think those girls look 16.....but then, I wouldn't peg half of the Americans as old enough to drive, either.
• Alicia asked me if Michael Phelps was contractually obligated to take off half of his swimsuit once he's out of the water.  I don't know what the big deal is, I see a chiseled physique like that each morning when I get out of the shower.
• Is it me, or does Andrea Kremer sound like a schoolgirl with a crush when she interviews Michael Phelps?
• Seriously though, winning 5 gold medals while setting 5 new world records (some of which are relay events, so props to the other guys, too).......that's pretty amazing.
• Hey camera team, I'm okay with a wide shot the next time an athlete steps off the mat/field/whatever after just blowing their chance at a gold medal.  I don't need you all up in some teenager's grill moments after her slip-up effectively eliminated the US from finishing in first.  She's trying not to burst into tears and you're practically inside the hugs of encouragement she's getting from coaches and teammates.
• Loved the interview with Phelps where he talked about his goggles filling up with water right after diving into the pool.  He wasn't a jerk about it, but surely someone somewhere is losing a sponsorship deal over this, right?
• You ever wonder what it would be like to be friends with Bob Costas?  I can barely handle the guy as a sports analyst / studio figurehead.  Can you imagine having him go into narrator-mode while eating pizza and watching a game, or just grabbing coffee?
• Thank you, Olympics, for keeping me up until 1:00 in the morning.  I wonder if I could call in late for work with the excuse that my body is on Beijing time?

Sunday Comes To Gather Me...

So....the new Counting Crows disc came out on Tuesday.  I watched it slowly download to my itunes library one song at a time, and it felt like waking up on Christmas Eve morning as a kid all over again.  I played it from start to finish and loved it from the first note to the last.  Not because it's perfect, but because it felt like hearing from old friends again.  In that way that old friends might be doing new things these days, but something about them doesn't seem to have aged at all.  At any rate, there have been some great articles come out this week that helped frame my understanding of the record, so I'm passing along a few links (Paste Magazine and Rolling Stone) to go with my personal recommendation to download or buy Saturday Nights & Sunday Mornings in its entirety.

(Watch for more on the record the next time I'm cooped up in my room and crawling out of my skin.)

It's Opening Night for Major League Baseball, with the Braves and the Nationals playing tonight on ESPN.  And though I will be taking tomorrow off, it is not, unfortunately, to catch a game somewhere on Opening Day - which my friend Bethe and I both agree should be an official national holiday.

And speaking of baseball, I have to plug my favorite baseball site: FIRE JOE MORGAN.  More accurately stated, it's a site devoted to skewering the many, many examples of egregiously bad baseball journalism from noted baseball writers and analysts - including ESPN's own Joe Morgan.  It's hilarious, well-written, and spot on in its critiques of shallow, poorly researched "analysis" of America's pastime. 

According to the email I received ten minutes ago, I am currently in first place in the NCAA Tournament Bracket Pool that I entered.  This is, quite simply, amazing.  I bet I watched twenty minutes of college basketball all season.  I may have watched another ten since it started.  My bracket is usually shot by the end of the second round, and always by the Elite Eight.  The fact that I am a Kansas - UCLA final away from winning the whole thing might just be a sign of the pending Apocalypse.  Then again, probably not.        But it could be.  Either way, Rock-Chalk-Jayhawk and Go Bruins, because first place is a nice little prize.

Ok, boys and girls...I've got the urge to pull my new camera out of my suitcase.  Cross your fingers for an extremely productive Sunday night to come.

Sting 'Em Jackets

Undefeated Howard Payne Wins Division III Women's Basketball Championship!

Full story here.

Awesome.